The One Thing I'm Scared Of

There’s one thing I’m scared about and it’s being in a relationship with someone special. I say this because I don’t want to take away from spending time with her but I still have my purpose and mission. I know there will be challenges with this and it’s why it’s so important for me to be with someone who will support me as I do her.


There has to be a sense of balance and I know that will be imperative to our relationship whoever this wonderful woman is. As I get older, I started to think maybe I’m meant to be on this journey alone to where I can focus on everything I want and need to do. Sadly that’s not the case, sometimes we do meet people who spark our interests and intrigue us in some way. 


I’ve spent the majority of my life single and alone so after a while, it becomes the norm, you accept it for what it is. It doesn’t phase you and you just go through the withdrawals of loneliness and then you eventually get over it. Well, I’m forced to get over it because for starters, I’m a man and secondly, I have too many goals to accomplish.


For me, a sense of balance will be necessary but the work can never stop. It’s continuous, it’s pushing myself to be great and hopefully I can push and drive her to be great. For over 5 years, I really didn’t need anyone to push me to be great, I had entrepreneurs and motivational speakers to keep me going. Just maybe, I need a voice of reason in my corner but there’s an internal struggle to find that in a world of people who live a life of monotony.


There has to be a wavelength that matches mine, there has to be a ‘no excuses,’ mindset when it’s time to get work done. Her goals don’t have to necessarily match mine, but if she has an innate drive to impact others and change the world, that will surely be a beautiful story. 


I can no longer deny that somewhere along the lines, I will meet someone who makes me smile and brings joy to my life. In the meanwhile, I will prepare to be someone who balances the workload I have and spending quality time with her. 


Be good everyone and go accomplish your goals!


Jamell Crouthers